Lost...and forced to empty dishwasher of knives

I'm not exactly sure what it says about me that I dreamed about Lost...you know, the TV show...other than I'm possibly a little bit TOO excited about its return in a couple of weeks, but I'm really not sure what it says about me that I was on the island and somehow forced to empty a dishwasher full of knives and random dishes.
 
Seriously.
 
This is the dream I just awoke from.
 
Oh yeah, and also in this dream, there was an animatronic donkey that looked and sounded like Donkey from Shrek, and he was getting hitched to some sort of robotic man that looked and sounded a lot like Lorne from Angel. It was like because Shrek wasn't there, Donkey needed a new friend. To be fair, Lorne is also green, so maybe that's the connection.
 
Oh My Gosh. My brain is cracked!!
 
So yeah...I'm hanging out with the Lost people, and we're going back to the island, and no one really wants to, but of course Ben is there and his crazy convincing powers convince us all to go, and as soon as we land, someone shoots at us, but they don't kill anyone because we're expecting it and have placed a decoy jacket on the beach for them to shoot. Then the pilot guy, Frank, is actually killed. And I'm stuck in the corner of the beach trying to unload this dishwasher while this Lorne/Donkey partnership ceremony is being performed, and I almost cut myself with a knife because whatever genius has loaded the dishwasher has put the knives all facing pointy side up.

And oh yeah, Sawyer was there in all his nearly shirtless glory, so at least that was a teensy bit delicious.
 
Number one, I clearly need to watch less TV and number two, really? I'm lost on the island and have to empty a dishwasher? Really???

Yes. That window's still broken.

Why is it that when you know something's broken, you will attempt to use it more frequently than you ever used it before it actually broke? All kinds of crazy.

On Christmas Eve, when pulling out of a parking garage in San Francisco, my window made this horrific clicking sound as it neared the top when I was rolling it up. It echoed so badly inside the garage that I thought someone was either shooting at me or had just set off firecrackers. I pulled out when I realized it was actually my window and then tried to make it stop. Note to self: release the button and the noise will actually stop. I figured the problem was that the window wasn't getting to the top and that it was getting stuck on something. I couldn't see what it was, and it was mostly up, so I headed back down the road...with a slight breeze on my head from the tiny crack between the top of the window and the actual top of the door.

When I got home, I manually pushed the window up and hoped that would fix it. I tried rolling the window down and then back up only to be surprised that the noise was still there. Yes. Stupid. I pushed it back up manually and actually didn't deal with it again for several days as I borrowed a friend's larger car while I had Christmas company in town.

When I retrieved my car I sort of hoped that the problem would have magically repaired itself. Look, I already told you I was crazy, so just go with it. Clearly the problem was still there, and I drove it right to the repair shop to see if they could tell me what the real problem was. I demonstrated the noise and they knew right away what I needed. Unfortunately, they couldn't fix it right away so I made an appointment for about six days later.

"Just don't use that window," he said as I was leaving. "That might make it worse."

"Right," I said. "No problem."

Of course, I don't think I need to tell you that I completely forgot that when I decided I needed to run through a drive-through and get a snack. And of course, the second I hit the button to automatically roll the window down was the exact second I remembered that I wasn't supposed to do it. Lucky me, I got to hear that fabulous clicking noise again when I rolled it up. Thankfully, it didn't actually break. The really dumb thing was, that wasn't the last time I did it. Seriously. I needed one of those childproof window switches so I couldn't touch it.

The window's fixed now, but good grief. I was ridiculous. I can't believe how hard it was to remember that yes, the window was still broken.

Why I shouldn't grocery shop...

I grocery shop like once every 3 months. Literally. I eat out. It's what I do. I make random trips to Target for necessities like Coke, popcorn and toilet paper, but every now and then, I make the journey to the actual grocery store. Today was one of those days. I was a little zealous having not been in a while and having been cooped up in my house for several days with a wicked cold, so it's not a surprise that there was a little crazy involved.

There were so many bags. TONS of bags. And I forgot I had a ream of paper in my trunk along with another empty box I'm supposed to be mailing something in. But, I got everything in. Including the 24-pack of toilet paper and 3 12-packs of Coke - necessities.

When I got home and opened the trunk, I discovered that the bar that comes down when you close the trunk had punctured a bag. The bag with the pound of sugar in it. And oh yeah, the sugar bag was punctured too and spilling into the trunk. Awesome.

I brought the bag gently into the house and set it on the stove with all the other bags as I always do. I set it down too hard. The sugar poured out. POURED. Into a large mound in the center of the stove. No matter what I did, the bag continued to pour sugar out of it. And really, getting that sugar off the stove? Yeah. That was easy. I finally got the bag wrangled and let it dump into a separate container while I attempted to remove the mounds - yes, plural - of sugar from the stove. It was just a treat, and not of the good kind. Then, I unleashed the Roomba to evict all the sugar that inevitably ended up on the floor.

The half empty bag is still sitting on the counter because the first container is now full. I could hunt down another container, but I'm just not in the mood. And really, I didn't even NEED the sugar. I had some that I didn't realize I had.

This is why I eat out. Shopping and dealing with groceries is just far too involved for my life.

Why I dream of bacon...

Okay, so a friend mentioned a dream to me today and said in passing that she should have it analyzed. So naturally, I turned to the genius of the Internet and decided to analyze my own crazy Vegas dream through the wisdom of the Dream Dictionary...enjoy!

Elevator - so what does it mean when they are just sitting there? Anyone?

• To dream that you are ascending in an elevator, suggests that you will quickly rise to status and wealth. You may have risen to a higher level of consciousness and are looking at the world from an elevated viewpoint. Descending in an elevator, suggests that you are being grounded or coming back down to reality. It also signifies setbacks and misfortunes.
• The up and down action of the elevator represents the ups and downs of your life. It also symbolizes emotions and thoughts that are emerging out of and submerging into your subconscious. Alternatively, the dream may have sexual connotations.
• To dream that the elevator is out of order or that it is not letting you off, symbolizes that your emotions have gotten out of control. It may be a reflection of your life or your career. You are feeling stuck in some aspect of your life, whether it is your career, relationship, etc.

Girls - okay, this seems reasonable, I mean, I AM 15 after all...

• To see a girl in your dream, represents your playful, innocent, and childlike nature. Perhaps you are behaving immaturely in some situation. Alternatively, a girl represents the feminine qualities of your character.

Shopping - color me intrigued...

• To dream that you are shopping, indicates your needs and desires. It also represents opportunities that you come across in life. Consider what you are shopping for and what needs you are try to fulfill. In particular, to dream that you are shopping for food and groceries, signifies your hidden attempt to buy the attention of others.
• To dream that you cannot find what you are shopping for, suggests that you are trying to find a solution to some life problem.

Box - okay, these are starting to freak me out a bit...

• To see a box in your dream, signifies your instinctual nature and destructive impulses. Alternatively, you may be trying to preserve and protect some aspect of yourself. The box may also symbolize your limitations and restrictions. Consider the pun of "being boxed in".
• To dream that you are opening a box, indicates that you are being revealed something about yourself that were once hidden. It symbolizes self discovery. Consider your feelings as you open the box. If opening the box fills you will fear, you may be uncovering aspects of yourself that cause you to feel anxious.

Baby - so if the baby's riding around in a jeep?

• To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you find a baby in your dream, then it suggests that you have acknowledged your hidden potential. If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses.

Bacon - I love the first part...bacon = essential...oh yes...

• To see bacon in your dream, symbolizes essentials, staples, and life's supply. It may also be a play on the common phase "bring home the bacon" to refer earning a living.

So, at the end of the day, my conclusion is the same...I'm completely cracked!!

Waking up in Vegas...

I really can't adequately describe the crazy dream I just woke up from...I'll just share some of the images...

When the dream began, or at least what I remember happening first, I was at Oracle, working on Oracle things, with Oracle people. And there were a lot of elevators.

And then I was outside and getting in a line of 12 or 13 girls, the 13th apparently being important; some were the 13th girl's friends, some were pulled in from various sorority houses nearby. That's right. Sorority houses.

Next, I was in a store that sold lots of little figurine type things, and I was looking for something for my mom, something with a cactus on it. Why? Exactly. I'm not exaggerating when I say there were millions of things in this store. MILLIONS. I asked a clerk for assistance and she took me to another room where she proceeded to move a ginormous stuffed something in order to get to what she wanted to show me: a box with a cactus on it that sort of flipped upside down, and apparently, gave off different scents. I sniffed and only smelled wood. She was insistent that each side held a different scent. I don't think I bought the box.

Right before I woke up, I was driving around in a jeep, and there was a baby in it. And then we were by my church, sort of. I saw our worship director going into the building, that's the only reason I know it was my church.

And then, someone walked toward me with a slab of bacon and showed me a very odd tattoo which led me to get excited. Apparently this tattoo, which to me looked like two thirds of a triangle was supposed to indicate that my hometown was now represented.

I couldn't make this stuff up people!

I guess that's what I get for waking up in Vegas...and man, I seriously need some bacon now!

Twitter-a-holic / Winner

So, here's how I spent my Friday evening...oh yeah, I'm crazy...but, I'm the winner, so whatev! Thanks @hodgesmusic!! That's David Hodges for the uneducated.

Um, what?

The dream I just woke up from contained a snake, some sort of mini lochness type snake thing with a giant head and a skunk.

• Um, what?

In addition, a former co-worker that I always liked barged into my office with a big 'tude not wanting to help me with anything but wanting my organizational diagrams which I informed her I'd done myself since no one else could possibly do anything.

• Seriously, what?

Plus I lived in a total hole...tiny and icky...and said creatures from above were loitering on the back porch which looked like it hadn't been dealt with for about 27 years.