In my dreams I'm friends with Angel

Sleeping in the middle of the day when I'm sick and on antibiotics brought my dreams to a whole new level of crazy today. I fell asleep watching Angel and then dreamed I was friends with the young vampire with a soul, a.k.a. a young David Boreanz. Yes, I realize there's something wrong with me.

So, I'm in this dream, and it starts with me laying across a bed looking at figurines and pictures on an end table. And as I'm looking at these things, I realize how sweet the figurines are - little Santas and Christmasy things, and then lots of photos of, apparently, an even younger Angel. Then Angel sort of scoots up toward where I'm laying and starts looking at the things with me. And then he gets really quiet and it becomes clear that this is some sort of tribute to him made by an old friend who has now apparently died. And it's suddenly very sad. And then this old friend's mom comes in the room and sort of freaks out when she sees Angel and then gets all emotional because it's been so long. She's asking where he's been, and he's apologizing, and I'm just sitting there watching. 

The scene suddenly changes, and Angel and I are sitting outside on a curb amidst a giant wind where red dirt is blowing all around, but apparently he's done something with some sort of magical power to make it this way because I ask him why it's winter. He just sits there and then I get all mad because it's clear he's made it winter to avoid going to the funeral of the friend. I then proceed to get up and walk away.

And then I woke up and wondered what in the heck was in these antibiotics I'm taking!

Are you married?

So, this question was asked of me last night by a sort of random nice guy that I barely know, and it wasn't at all skeevy, but clearly I'm still thinking about it, so I guess it threw me a bit. We were just chatting about random sports-related things and he asked if I was married (I already knew he was). "No," I said in my oh-so-light-and-airy tone. "It's just me." 

And then the part that's still frittering its way around my brain...because let's be honest, especially those of you who know me, I'm not really the marrying kind. Or at least I've never really thought of myself as the marrying kind. Like, if it happened, okay, I'm good with that, but if not, well, that's okay too. I've never wanted kids, so that's not an issue for me, and frankly, I'm far too selfish when you really get right down to it to actually be good at being married...whatever that might mean. All I know is, it seems pretty hard when you watch it from the outside, and I applaud those of you making it work. You rock.

But you know, when someone asks you that sort of question, it naturally makes you think. When their response back to you when you tell them you're not married is, "Aww, that's too bad. You'd make some guy a great wife...all your sports interest..." and then just shakes his head? Well, then...you think more than you should. Because then you wonder...if that were actually true, then where exactly is this guy and what exactly is he waiting for?

But is that really true? Is that really all it takes? I gotta think not, but I've always said my best move would be to marry a professional athlete because they're gone half the time and wouldn't bother me, but again, that seems sorta selfish, right? And now they're all too young anyway, so it just wouldn't be right at any level, but that mini conversation, along with my 3 days of strong antibiotics and steroids apparently tripped out my brain enough that I felt I should share it with you.

Welcome, once again, to my own personal crazy...

As a final note, this little event was at least 127 ways better than the last time someone asked me if I was married...while I was filling my car up with gas (headed, ironically, to a wedding celebration event!). I admit it. I lied. I said I was. Because he was ALL kinds of skeevy and the conversation needed to end immediately.