In my dreams there are flight attendants, Matt Nathanson and Magneto...

I can't believe it's been two months since I posted on this blog...it's not that life hasn't been crazy...just more serious crazy than normal crazy. Does that even make sense? I don't care.

Well...when I awoke this morning I could only shake my head at the series of dreams that wandered through my not-very-deep sleep last night. I seriously don't know where I get this stuff...

Part One: 

My friend Tasha and I were going on a trip overseas. This isn't really that crazy since she goes overseas all the time. I've never been but I do have my passport and we've discussed potential journeys for the future. We got seated on the plane and honestly, it was more like a giant limousine, but the seats were very comfy. And then I realized I didn't have my passport...and that I'd left it in my suitcase which was, inexplicably, still in the hotel. Yeah. I don't get it either. The flight attendant told me there was still time for me to go back and get it - fyi, she was dressed like a flight attendant from the 60s; yeah, I don't get that either - so, I crawled over a couple of businessmen and through the back of the plane. And again, it was like the backseat of a limo as I pulled seat cushions out of the way and crawled out onto the pavement and then proceeded to wander into a warehouse (hangar?) and push the button for a service elevator. I waited for several minutes then got on and went through some crazy series of floors to get to my room where I found my suitcase then left to, I suppose, go back to the plane. That was the end of that.

Part Two:

The beginning of the second part is a bit fuzzy but it seemed like I was watching a movie but then maybe I was in the movie or maybe it was all happening in real life. Let me just say that the key player was Magneto from X-Men, the one played by Ian McKellen. And it was like he was in all these little magnetic pieces in a box, and I opened the box in the back of a cab and he started to form. OMG, what??? I haven't watched an X-Men movie in months so who knows where any of this came from. The next thing I knew I was in a town and going to a Matt Nathanson concert and these two girls, supposed fans, come out of nowhere to go with me. I don't know them in the dream (no idea who they might be in the real world either) but I don't seem to trust them. It seems like they either work for Magneto or are spies or something. Anyway, we get to this bar where he's supposed to play and it's this huge place with dark wood paneling and lots of halls and corners and we're looking for him but don't find him. I then lose the two girls somehow and see him coming down the stairs - apparently he's supposed to perform upstairs. The girls then reappear and we all go up with him and the upstairs of this place is like this creepy family restaurant and it's all decorated for Christmas. And there are lots of kids there and I'm thinking that it's not Matt's normal crowd, but he sits down to play and I attempt to sit on this couch but the Christmas tree is so big that I can't so I just stand and the whole thing is very awkward. A few minutes later we're sitting at a picnic table in someone's back yard - me, Matt and the two girls - and apparently they're trying to help him get away from Magneto. And that's about the time I woke up. 

I have seriously lost it. Wow.

In my dreams, I get nothing signed by Matt Nathanson...

It's been a long time since Matt Nathanson graced the corners of my dreams, but I just woke up from a short snippet that was entertaining enough to share.

I was at some sort of event...no idea what...and remember standing in line to get my parking validated. When I got to the front I turned my parking ticket over and stuck a validation sticker on the back then handed it to the checkout lady. She looks it over and tells me it's going to be $2.50. I hand her a five-dollar bill and she hands me back $11.50. I'm like, "you gave me too much," and hand her back one of the five-dollar bills thinking at first that she'd given me a five and two ones. She giggles and thanks me, then I realize the other bill is a five and hand it back and ask her for a one. She's clearly confused and takes the five then hands me a ten, and this goes on for another few seconds until I get the right change. Crazy.

The dream then shifts and I'm standing in line waiting for Matt to sign something, but it's not like I was at a concert; it's more like he's at a street fair and people are getting things signed. Very strange. So there are two people in front of me - and really they were more to the side of me - and I'm totally eavesdropping on their conversations with Matt. He's sitting at a desk like you'd see in grade school, where it's connected to the chair, and he's got a large poster board in front of him that he's writing on. And it's almost like he's drawing a caricature and not really signing things at all. The woman he's talking to at first is leaning in and he draws a cartoon bubble like he's going to write dialogue in it. And he's saying something about President Bush and they laugh, but he doesn't actually write anything and then she leaves. Then a man starts talking to him, and he's just prattling on and on about nothing and it's very clear that Matt wants to leave and be free of him, but he's listening and trying to be nice and then I start to doodle on a corner of the paper and draw my own cartoon bubbles that look more like fuzzy circles, and this guy can't finish his thoughts and Matt is going crazy. Eventually, Matt says he has to go and that he'll be back the next day, and then he just packs it up and leaves.

What?

In my dreams, I'm on a VH1 game show with Matt Nathanson

Those of you that are Matt Nathanson fans, or possibly fans of VH1's Don't Forget the Lyrics, know that he was on there recently and almost won all the monies (check out a clip here). Unfortunately, he did not win, but he was completely entertaining to watch and certainly fun to listen to sing. If you've ever seen him live, you also know that he is hilarious and a teensy bit whacky.

In my dream, I was on a stage, and my friend Jill was with me, and there were a variety of other people there, and, of course, Matt. I have absolutely no idea what this game show was because it's nothing I've ever seen or heard of, but it had something to do with singing along with Matt, or Matt singing and us mimicing him...seriously. It was bizarre. So, there are some people sitting out in folding chairs and some of us up on a stage, and I was standing next to Matt, and he keeps cracking himself up and therefore cracking me up too. Jill was a couple of people down from me, and a kid next to me kept getting talked to by the producer. It's like he wasn't into it enough or something and the producer was trying to get him more excited. Meanwhile, I'm just standing next to Matt cracking up and practically have tears in my eyes because I was laughing so hard. 

At one point, Matt's supposed to sing a part of a song and basically stand in front of each person and sing it; again, no idea what sort of crazy show this is, but that was the deal. So he's sort of walking down this line of people singing this line, and when he hits the person next to me (on the other side, not the one that kept getting talked to) he just cracks up when he watches them sing the line back, and this cracks me up, and we sort of get in trouble because they have to start something over. The next thing I know, he's back standing next to me, and we're watching the playback or something and we both just die laughing and he puts his arm around my shoulder and we are seriously laughing so hard that it hurts. And the producer seems at a loss for what to do because clearly he can't get that upset with Matt since he's like the star of this show or whatever.

So then the guy goes to the piano and is telling all of us, Matt included, that we need to be able to hit certain notes, and then he just plays this completely random series of notes on the piano. They are all over the place from very low to very high and people are trying to sing them and the producer is in pain from listening, and Matt turns to me and he's like, "Oh, I got this," and I say something like, "Of course you do." Then I guess he sings them, though I don't actually remember hearing him sing them, because the next thing I say to him is, "Nailed it!" and I do a little motion with my hands, and then he laughs and says, "Nailed it!" and mimics the motion I did and we crack up laughing again.

So then we're just chatting and this woman comes up and sees that we're getting along, and she seems to be his manager or something, not really sure. And it seems like we're talking about how long I've been following him, and how much I love his music, and he says, "So, did you like that thing we did in November?" and of course I say I loved it and it was great and he seems really excited about that and so does the woman, and I'm not completely sure what he was talking about, but I didn't get to find out anymore because naturally, that's when I woke up.

And now I'm thinking, November? What thing in November? I must know!

So there you have it. A little pre-Christmas crazy from me to you.

Oh the dreams I dream...

Over the last two nights I've had some crazy sorts of dreams...really though, just a bunch of dream snippets. I debated blogging Friday night's dreams yesterday but never got around to it, so thought I'd add last night's into the mix. So, here they are...in no order whatsoever...just the brief snippets to prove, once again, that I'm nothing if not crazy.

In snippet one, I'm at a movie theatre, and there are HUGE escalators everywhere. I'm with a friend or two, but they keep changing as I move about this giant theatre. At one point, I get to some popcorn, but there's something hard about actually getting it. We do it, but it's exhausting. At another point, we're in a buffet line, choosing other foods to eat. I'm not sure if we're taking that food into the theatre or what because the dreams morphs after that.

Snippet two finds me in a large group of people all talking about/obsessed with babies. I'm not obsessed with them, but everyone else is. And in fact, there's a huge room filled with babies in cages. Yes. Cages. Like they're animals in a shelter. Now, those of you that know me know that I'm not a fan of babies, but even I realize they shouldn't be kept in cages. But in the dream, it's all perfectly normal. And so, people come to this room to get their babies. And I remember some of the characters from the TV show Parenthood being there, which sort of makes sense because there's a storyline about one of them wanting to have another baby, but I also remember my grandfather being there, so who knows what all of that was about.

Snippet three finds me walking in New York with my friend Mary - who actually lives in New York in real life, so that's not really a stretch. What's weird in the dream though, is that it's like she's never been there. And it appears that we're walking in Brooklyn, and are looking for a specific restaurant. And so we walk, and we keep going through these mini tunnels, and then we go through one and realize we've gone too far...like we've crossed into the dark side of Brooklyn, where a street performer is playing percussion on some old plastic containers. In front of a tennis court that seems run down. We turn back and appear to be in a large open area in the vicinity of the Brooklyn Bridge. Before I know it, the dream finds the two of us sitting at a table having breakfast. With Matt Nathanson. And a waiter is there and he takes an orange out of Matt's drink and squeezes it into mine. And it seems perfectly normal. And then waiter has a camera, which apparently is Matt's, and he starts to take our picture, only I'm totally not paying attention, but I do smile in the end, and it's a good picture of the three of us and Matt assures us that he'll email it to us.

And finally, snippet four finds me going to a concert. That's not really so unbelievable, but weirdly, I had two concerts to attend in one night. At the same venue. One was free, and one I had a ticket to. But even I was confused about it in the dream. So I got to the venue, which I believe was the HP Pavilion in San Jose, and the first concert is really tiny in a room that seats about 50 people. And so I sit down at a table with people I don't know, and someone brings me a salad that I don't really want, and then some sort of sandwich or other food that I also don't want. And I pick at it, and then they come and take it away. The concert is supposed to be Aimee Mann and her sister. I've never listened to her music, nor do I know if she has a sister, but the concert never actually materialized in my dream anyway, so whatever. From there, I am in some sort of transportation device headed to the other concert. This was confusing since I thought it was in the same venue. And in front of me, I see a friend in another vehicle, and he's looking at me and wondering how it is that I'm behind him when he thought I wasn't going to be there or was going to be late or something. I try to tell him that I'll explain later. And then I'm in a van with a bunch of ladies I used to work with, and they're pulling into a parking space by some water, and I try to tell her that she's gone too far, but she doesn't believe me. And when I get out, I'm practically in the water and I finally make her back up. And then the parking lot changes and there are other spaces, and she moves while gates are opened and closed remotely. I also see the Chief of Police from my current workplace trying to get her smart car in under a gate, and she seems rather sneaky about it, but I just look at her and move on. The other concert, who I have no idea who was, never materializes either and then I wake up.

No wonder I never feel rested when I wake up!